With two weeks left in 2015, Apple’s future is looking surprisingly uncertain given its status as the world’s most valuable company. Its market cap over the course of the year has fallen from its peak of $775 billion to just over $614 billion as of Thursday. Its iPhone — which accounts for well over half its…
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How Hogwarts Is Handling The Brexit
Many people have been concerned about how the Brexit will affect citizens on both sides of the debate in the UK.
Negotiations on trading, treaties, and even immigration will have to be redefined, and many people’s jobs and school careers could be challenged in the process.
The wizarding world is already facing obstacles in the aftermath of the Brexit
Berite Bott’s Every Flavored Beans Can No Longer Make Every Flavor
Due to Europe’s resentment towards the UK, they are no longer granting the jellybean company access to ingredients needed to make every flavor.
It looks like Bertie’s flavors like lemon and soap that were imported from France are now being replaced with UK accessible ingredients like spotted-dick and haggis.
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The QWCA (Quidditch World Cup Association) Has Decided To Exclude The UK From Participating In All Future Tournaments
Hogwarts fears that fewer athletes will choose to attend their school if it no longer feeds into the professional league.
Professor Hooch has been sending her star players off to the wizarding school in Spain, but many of their UK fans are outraged by what they feel is an absolute betrayal.
“They have to play,” Hooch pleaded. “I don’t care what is happening with this country, my players have to make it”.
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Gringots Has Gone Bankrupt
Now that so many of their wizards have had to pull their accounts and transfer to EU banks, the famous treasury has taken a huge blow.
Many homeless goblins have been seen wandering the streets of Hogsmeade with signs reading, “will work for access to Europe portkey”.
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Students Are Disillusioned By The System
Hogwarts was expected to host the Triwizard tournament this year, but with previous fatal incidents, the Ministry of Magic was weary to grant them the opportunity.
Now, they’ve received word that Romania is refusing to lend them dragons for the competition, and students are feeling disheartened by the whole event now.
“It really is a shame”, said dragon handler, Charlie Weasley.
“I wish I could help my alma mater, but I have to due what’s best for my dragons,” Weasley told RISE NEWS. “Let’s face it, the Ministry of Magic has always underpaid us for our dragons, and at this point, the paperwork needed to bring them over is more than anyone can do in a lifetime”.
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The Ministry Of Magic Is In Tatters And It Is Spreading Hate Worldwide
Wizarding leaders are divided between those that wish to host European wizards, and those that wish to push current ones out.
From across the pond, a Brexit advocate, Drump Trumpledore praised the UK for leaving what he calls, “the failing European Union”.
He commends them for “taking control”, and spews out rhetoric concerning his similar intentions for the wizarding world of the USA, (The Umbridge Sectumsempra Americas).
“We’re gonna put up a wall of dementors”, he told our reporters.
“But we’re gonna make Mexico pay for the charms we use to keep that wall strong”.
Trumpledore told citizens to protect themselves from immigrating wizards.
“If Americans want to feel safe and in control, they should go buy more wands,” Trumpledore said. “Good guys with wands stop bad guys from using their wands”.
When asked on her thoughts, J.K. Rowling mentioned her disappointment with the choice to leave the UK.
In her usual eloquence, she stated, “My values are not contained or proscribed by borders. The absence of a visa when I cross the channel has symbolic value to me. I might not be in my house, but I’m still in my hometown”.
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It is a shame that villainous belief conjured up the majority of votes to cast out a union for the people.
It eradicated an identity that had been granted as a privilege to citizens of the UK and of Europe alike.
No one is truly clear on how this Brexit will affect the Western world, but everyone is anxious to find out.
The UK is in big trouble now that the Brexit has taken place, and Hogwarts worries whether it will remain a school for all young witches and wizards in the years to come.
For now, Bertie Bott is readapting his recipes, the dragons are staying in Romania, and Trumpledore is still a bigot and the source of annoyance for every intelligent mind on this side and on the other side of the Atlantic Ocean.
RISE NEWS is a grassroots journalism news organization that is working to change the way young people become informed and engaged in public affairs. You can write for us.
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Did This Astronaut Just See A UFO From The Space Station?
File this one to crazy things people say online.
American Astronaut Scott Kelly is currently embarking on an impressive feat- staying in space for nearly a year, 342 days to be exact.
Everyday, he sends out at least one tweet showing amazing views of the Earth from the International Space Station.
He did the same on Nov. 15 as he was above southern India.
Day 233. Once upon a #star over Southern India. #GoodNight from @space_station! #YearInSpace pic.twitter.com/ipT4AsDDir
— Scott Kelly (@StationCDRKelly) November 15, 2015
Just a normal tweet. Beautiful light, wow so pretty. OH DEAR GOD IS THAT A UFO IN THE UPPER RIGHT?
Yeah probably not, but some people are taking this pretty seriously.
“Scott Kelly likes to send out photos of the view from the windows of the space station…and they look cool,” Scott Waring, an editor of ufosightingsdaily.com wrote according to CBS News. “This one however has a cigar shaped glowing UFO with a metallic body in it. The UFO is about 25 meters long and 150-200 meters away. It looks like Scott was trying to hint at the existence of aliens. Message received Scott, and thanks.”
This video talking about the alleged UFO has nearly 300,000 views.
What do you think? UFO or not? Tell us in the comments below.
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Study Finds That Frequent Emoji Users Think A Lot About Sex
We found that something as innocuous as a food item emoji icon can be employed to denote body parts or sex when Instagram banned the eggplant emoji from its search algorithm earlier this year after it was used to tag “lewd” photos of men and their, um, well, eggplants. Perhaps to no surprise to fans of… Read More
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One comment on “2016 Could Be A Make Or Break Year For Apple”
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Months ago I dropped and shattered my iPad screen. 350 dollar repair cost in Canada. So I have been walking around with this iPad with a very noticeably destroyed screen. It catches everyone’s eye, and they comment. This leads to my explanation of the cost to fix it. I often hear the people remark they would never get an iPad based on the that. I suspect that while others can afford to opt for a new apple product, many cannot, and this may be affecting apple’s bottom line.